


"I'd die for you"

by aimforthedogstar



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-26
Packaged: 2019-10-16 21:46:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17553797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aimforthedogstar/pseuds/aimforthedogstar
Summary: All the times Sirius Black uttered those words to one Remus Lupin...





	"I'd die for you"

The first time Sirius ever said those words to Remus was in first year. The words were just words, they held no meaning or feeling behind them. It was convenient. When Sirius and James, trying to pull off an elaborate prank way out of their expertise, had found themselves struck in the Potion’s supplies cupboards had had to beg Remus to get them out. (not that the two black haired boys would ever admit to). “Hey Lupin, come on. Help a fellow Gryffindor out wouldya, where’s your house spirit, you know I’d die for you, right?” It was also the first time Remus came under the full influence of ‘the-pitiful-puppy-dog-eyes’ of one Sirius Black which by some unknown power always managed to melt even the coldest of Remus’ reservations.

 

The next time those words came out of Sirius’ mouth was the night that changed Remus’ world. Unlike other such significant nights in the short term of his life so far, this changed it for the better. It was the night his secret was out and his friends didn’t care. Sirius had sat next to Remus, put a comforting arm around his shoulder pulling him closer, and whispered in a soothing voice that Remus couldn’t believe Sirius was capable of, “Hey, it’s okay. We won’t tell on you. You’re our friend. You’re my friend. I’d do anything for you. I’d die for you.” And with those words cemented bonds that made history.

 

The next time the words came from Sirius, Remus couldn’t help but actually believe in them. It was just another night in the dormitory when Remus had finally found out about the others plan to take on a highly risky endeavour all for him. When he came to know that his friends wanted to become animagi so they could keep him company, Remus had blown through the roof. He had never yelled so much so loud and so without inhibition in his life at the sheer stupidity of his friends. It was then that Sirius, calmly seated on his bed, had looked Remus straight in the eye and shrugged, “I’d die for you.” Those words had left him speechless and drained off of all anger and fear and gave way to memories that they all held dear till their last breaths.

 

The one time it pushed Remus over the edge when he heard those words were after ‘The Prank.’ When Remus has realised what Sirius had done, he shut down and away from Sirius. Treated him with cold indifference and acted like he didn’t exist because Remus had never been more angry in his life. And late at night he would fear his own anger and it’s intensity. After a week, when Remus was all alone in the dormitory, Sirius had made his way into the room like a hurt pup, stood in front of Remus’ bed and muttered in a broken voice, “I didn’t mean for this to happen, I didn’t think it would hurt you, I don’t want to hurt you, Moony, I’d die for you.” As soon as those words were muttered, Remus found himself swinging off the bed and hurtling himself towards Sirius and punching him with all his might. For a second, inflicting pain had felt good and the moment Remus realised that, he had reeled back and had sat defeated on his bed as Sirius lay on the ground, cheek and left eye beginning to purple. “You did hurt me, you idiot, what the hell were you thinking?! I am not your weapon and you will damn well respect that, if you ever do something stupid like this, so help me Merlin Sirius, I will…..” His voice had cut off at the look on Sirius’ face who just nodded and then the process of rebuilding the broken fragments between them had begun oh so slowly.

 

And when those fragments were rebuilt to form something new altogether. feelings of another nature took root between them. In the calm of moonless night, hidden away in a alcove somewhere on the seventh floor, embraced in one another’s warmth, Sirius has uttered those words once more in his life. “Moony, the way you make me feel, it’s so scary and amazing at the same time. I don’t know wholly what it is yet, but the one thing I do know Moons is that I’d die for you, because I love you.”

 

It was also true that Sirius was an overdramatic little shit. He liked to be so because he found it entertaining, especially bothering Remus when he was bored was his favourite timepass. And one one such occasions, Remus found himself immersed in homework at a table in the corner of the library when all of a sudden majority of the area, previously occupied by parchment and books. was found to be covered by his boyfriend lounging on it. “Moons, I’m bored. Come and do something fun with me.”

Without ever looking up from his book, Remus has said, “Go away Sirius, I’m busy.”

“Moony, you know I’d die for you, can’t you return the favour by providing delightful company to your delectable boyfriend when said boyfriend is in need of it.”

“If that’s truly the case, I need that said delectable boyfriend to perish away from me so I can finish this tonight.”

All that came as a reply was a pout but Sirius, surprisingly, had obliged him but only for another 20 minutes. But what could one truly expect from Sirius?

 

The next time those words were uttered was after they had graduated from Hogwarts. It was the day after the full moon, which was spent in a small shed in the forest outside of his parents cottage. For some reason James and Peter couldn’t make it and Padfoot was all that there was as company to Moony that night. The following morning, after seeing a few colourful bruises along Sirius’ ribs, Remus had worried over his safety and health despite that fact that he himself could barely hold himself up. It was then that Sirius had looked deep into Remus’ eyes, all the while holding him up in his strong arms, had said, “you know I’d die for you Moons, this is just a couple of bruises, I’ve had worse.” And that was that.

 

The only time those words had filled Remus with abject horror was during an Order Mission gone terribly wrong when he found himself with an armful of Sirius, limp and bleeding, having taken some sort of silver curse at his chest which was originally aimed at Remus. Never having felt so helpless and scared in his life, Remus had just bellowed, “Why?!” Why would Sirius do this? Sirius, loosing blood and barely conscious, had muttered in a pain filled voice trying to cup Remus’ cheeks, “I’d die for you, Moons.” Remus, having fresh tears well over in his eyes, shaking his head in slight exasperation, had forcefully pushed the words out holding Sirius tighter to him, “No, you don’t. You don’t have my permission, so don’t you dare.” And Remus with all his might had managed to hold on to the one most precious thing in his life for a little while longer.

 

And finally, in the aftermath of Halloween of ‘81, on one cold, lonely night, when anger and rage had burned brighter in Remus than all else, he had wished desperately that Sirius had kept that promise he had made so many times so he wouldn’t have had to lose his love to a fate filled with heartbreak and betrayal. Recounting all the times Sirius had said, “I’d die for you.” This was the only time, in response, Remus had wished he had.


End file.
